So, i tried doing that whole telling a story through letters thing. didn't work out. FUCKIT. today is the 31st december. it is approximately 9.34pm NOW. so there is still 2hours and 26minutes left till the new year. if you ask me, it just DOESNOT feel like the 31st december. i can recall around five or six 31st december's right now, and none of them have felt like this. it doesn't even feel like december. crap. i calm. i stop complaining.
ok, so here's the deal. i have spent my 31st december in a very odd sort of way. well, not odd. i just haven't done anything that someone would say 'OH MY GOD YOU DID THIS ON 31st AND IT MUSTA BEEN SO MUCH OF FUN'. ive done things which have made me feel nice only. yes. friend of mine's come down from hyderabad. had a nice time with him in the morning. ate pizza and burgers and saw a lot of pretty-pretty people. spent most of the early portion of the DAY wearing no winter-wear, simply because it wasn't even cold. 31st december, my ass.
now. other things. i am now probably the proud owner of an over-sized grey t-shirt that has FILTHYCUNT stylishly written across its chest. YES. i DID NOT buy it. someone else got it for me. and DINGDINGDING, he doesn't know what FILTHYCUNT means. HAHA. whatever. ok. then. in the evening i went out on a walk with an old friend. nicest walk ive had in a LONGLONG time. even the weather supported it. not cold, nor hot. pleasant. i STOLE a victoria's secret DREAMANGELS heavenly perfume from her bag. she knows it. she let me have it only. she didnt want it. what will i do? it comes in this tiny thing that fits in your palm. smells daaaaamn nice, man. yes. shutup.
RIGHTNOW im sitting and listening to songs. MERI LAUNDRY KA EK BILL EK AADHI PARI NOVEL what? i suddenly felt like listening to it. shut up.
so. ok. new year. whatever. doesn't make much of a difference i think. the last year passed by WAY TOO FAST for it to be a new year already. lets see.. i passed out of school. got into college. i NEVER DREAMED that i would get into this college. i thank whoever is responsible for this. i have made new friends. GOOD ONES also. yay! =D .. ok ok. all the capitals i have used in this post are actually shouts in my head. yes. good. OK ok. i dont feel like writing anymore. i have more things i COULD write, but i dont feel like it. i LOVE many things. yay! =D
snaps are: snap 1 is me. in Rrrr.'s new coat. holy comfortable, batman. ilove that piece of clothing. snap 2 is me. in a wig. NOTAWORD. snap 3 is a poster of DEFIANCE. upcoming edward zwick film with DANIEL CRAIG. yay =D click on DEFIANCE or the poster and you can see the trailer on YOOTOOB. ilovedanielcraig iwanttosee thisfilm RIGHTNOW!
Stretched out on the grass. If I wanted someone to lie beside me, I'd want you. If I wanted someone to hold my hand, I'd want you. If I wanted someone to stare at, I'd want you. If I wanted someone to fall asleep with in the cool shade of the trees on that chilly winter day, I'd want you. And if I wanted nothingness, I'd still want you.
And I'm not the only one staring at the sun. Afraid of what you'd find if you took a look inside I'm not just deaf and dumb staring at the sun. Not the only one who's happy to go blind.
Photograph taken at Santiniketan. I call it the Dark Sun. The quote in italics is from Staring at the Sun by U2.
The sound of someone chopping off the branches of a tree, when everything else is silent, is beyond description. It must be the feeling one gets when someone stabs you in the back. The sound of a rickshaw chain missing its metal loops, when everything else is silent and there is a needle chill burning your skin, is beyond description. It must be the feeling one gets when someone smashes your head with a hammer. The sight of a cave of trees lighted up by the headlights of a car, in pitch darkness, is beyond description. It is breathless. And it isn't time that's passing by, It is you and I.
Photograph 1 is a tree obstructing the sky. Photograph 2 is Doubletake,Doublethink walking on the rail-tracks. Both photos were taken on my trip to Santiniketan. The last two lines, which are in italics, is from a poem by Ruskin Bond.
I'm feeling pretty lame for some reason. I don't want to study. I don't want to do badly in the exam. I don't want to study. I have to make sure I don't do badly in the exam. There is a story called Cupid and Psyche in my syllabus. I have decided to not study it because it is very long and I have never studied it before. Above is a snap which I found when searching for Cupid and Psyche on Google Images. I have decided not to study it. I like the drawing though. Good job who-ever has drawn it. I like Psyche's hair. She is very pretty. Cupid reminds me of Angel from X-Men3. I want Cupid's wings. Right. Now. I still can't figure out what that lump under Psyche's chin is. Psyche is very pretty. I have an exam on Western Literature tomorrow.
To walk. To just be able to walk. Together. And not talk. And know when to talk. And know when to say what. And to be able to be happy about it. Silently. And to smiling on the inside. And not letting it show. And to actually mean it.
To experience happiness. To experience freedom. Solitude. Joy.
To be in love. But do nothing about it. in search of solitude.. Journal entry dated July 30th: Extremely weak. Fault of pot. Seed.. In Memory Of Christopher McCandles. Snaps taken from Into The Wild.
I'm going insane. as in bang my head on the wall just for the heck of itinsane. i'm bored. my exams are 4days away and i still haven't studied a thing. i just dont feel like it, man. i mean, i'm scared and all.. ooh whats gonna happen i'm gonna flunk kinda scared. not helping. i just cannot get myself to sit down with my study things. on the contrary, what i have been doing -
sleeping - oh its very nice, especially because of the nice weather. reading books - which are in no way related to my syllabus - jonathan livingston seagull. again. listening to music - i'll give you an entire playlist before this post ends. brooding - oh ohh ohhh. going out - whenever i've been able to muster the energy. and the need (sneak a drink of pepsi). bi-ii-ig issues my parents have about me having pepsi. the other day, i went all the way to new market just to have nahoums brownies :) watching stuff - well, i just got addicted to the o.c. again. i started downloading all the episodes straight from season1. i've been watching about 2episodes each day.
i'm useless. i should just die.
sigh. yesterday was the jethro tull/anoushka shankar concert. i am not even going to start talking about that lest i get carried away. it was bizarre. for reasons like 'i'm accustomed to seeing stuff like this on youtube where they've performed in london or arizona or wherever'. to see them in person.. damn. ian anderson is a very funny man. and anoushka shankar smiles a lot. the fusion tracks were really nice. especially the matchup at the end. the flutes.. absolutely amazing. by the end of it, it was kinda like.. 'haa. satisfaction. i think i can die now' or something. the lighting was beyond amazing. the entire show itself was something. i was having coffee during a break. Rrrr and a brother of her's were there. suddenly we get a report from inside that the show had started. i couldn't find a dustbin so i just chucked half a cup of coffee. no clue where it went. i located the dustbin a moment later, when i turned around.
moving on to other things. sometime last week, i cut myself while shaving. corner of my lips. shit it hurt. well, i thought it would cure in no time. boy, was i wrong. instead of healing, it's actually spread. the right corner of my lips are slowly starting to look like something straight out of the dark knight. no prizes for guessing what. it hurts. it really hurts.
i have this thing i do. given a situation, a word, something, anything really.. i directly relate it with some film or the other. i don't know. it just comes. i can't help it. it gets annoying after a while. trust me, i've been told. but, i'm really sorry. i just cannot help it.
we all know about the mumbai blasts by now. if anyone doesn't.. go flush yourself down the toilet. the night it happened, i didn't really think much of it because i was sleepy. i saw 10 dead, 25 injured, and i fell asleep. i woke up in the morning. two sms'es. both asking me to watch the bloody news. the later with a reference to the joker from the dark knight. speaking of chaos. my kind of reference. i turn on the news. chaos. i glue myself to the news for the next 3hours. straight. all that i see is chaos. at the end of the 3hours.. 82 dead, 200 injured. what i was seeing was shocking. it scared the hell out of me, man. the newspaper had the scariest photograph.. this old man being helped by a police official to walk out of the railway station. it was empty except for bags, and shoes, and blood everywhere. everywhere. i cant even imagine something like that happening. i'm done talking about this. it's too sad and scary.
here's the bunch of twelve songs that i've been hooked on to for the last couple of days. i made a playlist on iTunes. named it playlist. they're in the exact order below. nice songs. has a lot of emotion and meaning. a lot. and in case you haven't heard some of em.. click. you'll be redirected to a youtube video. :)
the snaps.. a - is a concert poster of the yeah yeah yeahs. i love the yeah yeah yeahs. b - is a piece of art which i like from doubletake, doublethink's bedroom wall. photo c/o senjuti. c - and i quote. introduce a little anarchy. upset the established order and everything becomes chaos. d - is a fork and a spoon holding hands and walking. just because..
Today, when i woke up in the morning, i felt a slight shiver. and although ive been feeling this chill for quite a few days now, today it somehow felt a little different. winter is finally arriving. i love the winter. i love christmas. i love it so much, i cant even begin to explain how much i love it.
and then i remembered i had a whole bunch of christmas songs. so, i sat down and started listening to them. i remember i was a huge Orange County fan. i loved that show. to an extent, i still do. and in the first season they played this song called 'maybe this christmas' in the chrismukkah episode. i loved it. here's the video.
Maybe this Christmas will mean something more Maybe this year love will appear Deeper than ever before And maybe forgiveness will ask us to call Someone we love Someone we’ve lost For reasons we can’t quite recall Mmm, maybe this Christmas - Ron S.
i love winter. i love christmas. i love it so much. it makes me happy.
And he sat there and he stared down at his paws. He felt lazy. He felt tired. He felt drowsy. Hungry.
His stomach grumbled. He hadn't had lunch yet. When was lunch coming?
He stared at the bars. He stared at his confinement. He stared at the spectators. Those two-legged creatures who glared at him. And they pointed. And they kept glaring.
He was feeling too lazy. Too tired. Too drowsy. Too hungry. He sat there. And he stared at his paws. When suddenly.. bomp.
Something fell. Somewhere near him. What was it? He raised his head and he looked around. There was a small ball of mud not too far away from him. Where did it come from? It can't harm me, he thought. He got back to staring at his paws.
And again.. bomp.
He raised his head again. And he looked around. Another small ball of mud. This time nearer. It was just beside one of his hinds. And before he had time to look around.. bomp.
On his belly. He gave a small grunt. And he looked at the bars. There were the two-leggeds. There were four of them straight ahead. Across the bars. They glared. And one of them moved it's arms. And.. bomp.
This time he felt it on his shoulder. He gave another small grunt. He looked straight at the two-legged that had moved. It made noises. Irritating ones. Screechy ones. He stared at it. Stared. Didn't move.
It moved again. And.. bomp. On his forehead..
He let out a roar. With unimaginable speed, he leapt towards the bars. They were merely a few paws away. He leapt. At the two-legged. That two-legged.
And he reached beyond the bars. And the two-legged hadn't seen it coming. It froze. It's face contorted. He could see it. He saw a flash of it's contorted face. Before his right paw smacked on it with a sickening thud. The left slashed at it's belly.
Red, thick, warm liquid gushed from it's face and it's belly. It bled.
And it screamed. And he snatched at it again and caught it in a hug. And he ripped it's belly apart. And he slapped it's face silly.
He could smell it. He could smell the blood. He could feel the warmth of it on his paws.
And he let go. He did not want to kill it. He knew he hadn't killed it. He let go. And it fell. And he roared. He roared like he had never roared before. And there was warm, red blood on his paws. And he roared..
And he let out a roar. And he looked up. The two-legged stepped back. And all four of them walked away. And he got back to staring at his paws.
It's approximately 12.13am. i've got a glass of chilled pepsi in front of me. i'm listening to free bird by lynyrd skynyrd. i've been listening to it for the past three-quarters of an hour. over and over again. it's the live version. it's 14minutes long anyways. enjoy the video here. the little picture above is a cute-emo. i'm sure you've seen stuff like that before. they're just too cute to ignore. :) :)
well, owe this meaningless post to the weather. it's chilly. the rain's stopped, but the bone-chilling wind's still there. i hate the weather we've been having for the past three days. it's soggy, and it's dark, and it's depressing. i couldn't go out of my house for the last two days. finally when there was some sunshine today, i put on my brand new shoes (very nice song by paulo nutini. check it out here) and i went out and had phuchka and a chicken roll, and mishti. it was so damn worth it, because as soon as i got home, the weather fucking changed back to dark and depressing again!
my mother is crawling up my back telling me to get a haircut. 'piku, jao chul kete esho.' 'piku, chul kete esho noeto tomake kichhu'r jonye taka debona.' 'piku, chul kete esho noeto tomae kothao jete debona.' 'piku, jao chul kete esho.' you get the picture, right? but the thing is.. i don't want to cut my hair. it's actually long enough to tie at the back now. but i don't do that. it feels weird.
yesterday, i fell in love with the way liverpool played against chelsea. they won 1-0, and although the goal wasn't that good a goal, they deserved to win. so much for manchester united. i wonder what's wrong with them. defender rio ferdinand actually looked like he had been run over by a car and thrown onto the football field the other day. after 60-odd minutes into the game, he looked exactly like it. i swear. i love football. i love all the teams, and all the players. they just make everything so entertaining. i love football.
it's diwali week. tomorrow's kali pujo. i haven't enjoyed kali pujo or diwali for a couple of years now. earlier, when i was littel-er, my cousin sister and i used to burst crackers together, and it was great fun. then, suddenly, it just stopped. and i haven't burst crackers since. tomorrow i'll probably be going over to a friend's place for lunch and all. i don't know. the plan might get cancelled. i hope it doesn't get canceled. i don't want it to get canceled. i want everyone who's supposed to come to come, so that the plan doesn't get canceled.
i've been rambling enough. photo two is lynyrd skynyrd live in concert. just because i like them. photo three is another cute-emo. it's cute. there, i said it. think whatever. see if i care.
Well, this is going to be a film post. I know I have another blog set aside for films, but this isn't a review, so it's appropriate that I post this here.
I've been obsessed with Spiderman 2 for the past couple of days. This is the second time. The first time was, well, when the first posters and promos came out in late 2003. Then the soundtrack came out. Here I must admit something. I'm a cheapskate when it comes to buying music cd's and all, but this album I bought. It cost me some 300 odd rupees. That is very very expensive for me. And also you must keep in mind that most of the artists who had songs in this album I had almost never heard of before. The most significant mention on the album cover was Music from and inspired by the film Spiderman 2. Now, understand this - The songs in this album are either played during the film at some time or the other; or the songs are directly related to the film, which means that the songs were written especially for the film and what the film portrays. Advanced screenings were given to selected artists in order to come up with original compositions for the film.
All of that, and Voila, you get the Original Soundtrack for Spiderman! The end result is mind-blowing. The OST features the talents of Dashboard Confessional, Train, Hoobastank, Jet, Yellowcard, Maroon 5, Taking Back Sunday, Midtown, lostprophets, Smile empty Soul, The Ataris, Switchfoot, Ana, Jimmy Gnecco, Danny Elfman, She Spider, and Strings (yes, Sony, Columbia Pictures, Marvel, and Sam Raimi himself decided to include Na Jaane Kyun in the album).
Speaking of the film; I must state first that it is my favorite among the three Spiderman films (damn, i hope they make a few more of them!). Alfred Molina is a-natural in this film. I thought Willem Dafoe's casting as Norman Osborn was as close to perfect as they would get in the Spiderman films. Boy, was I wrong! Otto Octavius was perfect. More perfect than the perfectest perfect. The film itself was amazing. Everything about it was great. The action sequences (which HAD to be perfect to match up to the one's in its predecessor) were out of this world. Right from Octavius' accident and havoc caused by his metallic arms; to the train sequence to the closing show-off. Wow. Special mention for James Franco as Harry Osborn (how could you kill him in just the third film, Mr. Raimi? sigh).
Enough said. Pictures one and two are wallpapers of the film. The second one is pretty rare. The third picture is of Dashboard Confessional. It's just a really good photograph. The first song of the album is Vindicated by Dashboard Confessional. They're lead singer and guitarist Chris Carrabba wrote the song in fifteen minutes after a special screening of the film. Remember, all the tracks in the album are something entirely different. If you love music, you will love them. Straight from the unlike-Maroon 5 track called Woman, to Switchfoot's hot guitaring in Meant To Live, to the awesome violin solo in Yellowcard's Gifts and Curses. If you can find this album in the market, buy it. It comes with a booklet with stills from the film and a bonus vcd with trailers and interviews. You'll thank yourself.
Well, that's my birdday cake. it's heavenly. my friends couldn't have any because i forgot to serve it after dinner. honest. i forgot. i had lots and lots of pepsi and chocolate ice cream after midnight yesterday, and today, after almost two years, i have fever. and i shouldn't really be sitting in front of the pc and posting on my blog (or just sitting in front of it either), but i feel like it. so, there.
today is lokhhi pujo. i slept while my mother did the pujo. i slept for five hours. ALL damn afternoon. then i woke up and lazed around, and i read the book which Rrrr gave me for my birdday. damn, it's good. freaky. honest. and freaky.damn honest. and damn freaky. i already read around hundred pages of it. i couldn't eat after that. it's freaky. very very freaky.
i have these phases. they come and go. i'm sure it happens to everyone. you know, when suddenly you get hooked on to something. a book. a film. a song. etc etc. well, for the third time in my life, i'm having my ac/dc phase. rather, back in black phase. i can't stop listening to the album. over and over again. over and over again. over and over again. over and.. well, you get the picture. and one more song.. hard as a rock! that's from their 1995 album, ballbreaker. hot song. really hot song!
photo one : that be jishus. he suffers from ocd. he can't have food which has been had by others. damn, i can't find the english word for it (it'll come to me). it's called ettho in bengali. well, he wouldn't have the cake because he thought that Rrrr had ettho-fied it, which she hadn't. me and soham forced him to have some. this is what he looked like after i had shoved a handful of cake into his mouth. yes, freaky. i know.
photo two : this is the photograph of the evening. Pip the drunk looking bear. he is drunk, rather. chiquita gave him to me for my birthday. Rrrr righfully declared that he was drunk. and i named him Pip (to various objections of chiqui which i refuse to elaborate here). well, i placed him next to Rrrr as she was having fun with her phone, and i clicked this. it just looks too the funny, i'm sorry. it looks too funny. looook at pip.
photo three: just a drawing i drew on my wall. think whatever you want.
I need a gun to keep myself from harm. the poor people are burning in the sun.
if u asked me why exactly i liked Gorillaz, i wouldn't be able to tell you. not exactly at least. i think i always liked the band and the members more than their songs. then again, i love the songs. i spent 2hours sitting in starmark one day reading a Gorillaz encyclopedia. i forgot most of the things i read in it because, well, there was way too much written in it. plus, i was paying too much attention to the colorful photos.
from left to right : murdoc niccals (the bassist), russel hobbs (the drummer), noodle (with guitar), 2D (the lead singer).
they ain't got a chance. they ain't got a chance. i need a gun, coz all i do is dance. coz all i do.. is dance..
note : photo of gun; my own. lyrics - dirty harry by gorillaz.
I'm sleepy. i have been since afternoon. Yet, I had enough energy to go and buy some stuff from this mall in the evening - my red All-Star Converse shoes got absolutely ruined because Istepped in wet mud and my left foot literally drowned in it. Some woman nearby laughed when that happened. it was dark, right on the side of the bypass. I felt like fucking killing the bitch. BITCH! My Converse shoes.
I think I did badly in my internal exams the past week. I don't know actually. I don't even know what i wrote in the exams. They were just weird. Then on Friday, after the exam, something really funny happened. It was raining heavily. Pouring. And people were getting drenched. Suddenly a bunch of my classmates grabbed hold of me and dumped me into a depression with knee-deep water. It felt heavenly. The moment they carried me out onto the roof (Yes, roof with pool-like depression.) I stopped screaming. I felt the rain pouring down on my chest; and then I drowned. Rrrr claims she just stood by and watched the people carrying my thrashing carcass-like body across the corridor and out onto the roof. My elbows got bruised. My a/v player was in my pocket then. It's acting weird now. Then we were attending the screening. It was kind of cold in the room, so I caught a bit of a cold.
Saturday, I met up wit Sry, after ages. We were wearing similar shoes, and she had this thing that I was taking photographs of her ass. I wasn't. Then there was this cool guy, wearing three-quarters, huge socks, with an iPod in his ears. Oh no, wait - Did i say cool? Right. It was fun. Kinda scary - really scary car-ride home. Her dad was driving. When she introduced me, she said, 'Sambit - Dad. Dad - Sambit.' and I said, 'Hello.. dad.' That was so stupid. Watched Rock On with three friends in the evening. Not a bad film. Going out to watch a film with people you actually like is really nice. Sometimes even bad films feel nice. Had that experience the week before. Actually someone else made the statement i just made.
Note: the photographs - Headlights (clicked on my way home. there was a lights out!), and same shoes (really difficult to click since both of us kept losing our balance).
I'm sleepy. Very sleepy. I have to eat now. I can smell good food. There's no Pepsi in the house. Damn. Tomorrow's Monday. I hate Mondays.
I've got two exams tomorrow and i know virtually nothing. i like the subject, but i'm not in the mood to study. at all. i stayed up for the better of the night studying nothing. well, trying, but not succeeding. i woke up late. very late. and now since i don't feel like studying, i'm writing this.
I had an urge to draw something. oo ooo wait, i have a pet fish now. her name is Fish and she has the biggest cutest eyes. well, eye actually. since i haven't seen her other eye. yes, its complicated. i feel like complaining about the fact that my mother promised to make good food this afternoon but she isn't, but i'll let that pass. isa has had a productive weekend. she's now totally dry after her month's bath. she's not exactly squeaky clean though.
I'm still unfamiliar with a better part of my university campus. the mashi at my favorite canteen got pissed with me the other day for shouting for food. she kinda scolded me. indirectly. then the next day we didn't go to her canteen for food, and later she asked us why we hadn't come. she's a sweet mashi. i like her. i'll eat from her canteen on monday again. The photograph above was taken on one of those leisurely strolls through the campus. that's one of those things which rarely happen because most of the time we're just too lazy. sitting around and burning stuff and having five star and ice tea is nice enough. i like the photograph though. we were talking, while walking. and we came up with the conclusion that we'll probably have some place in the campus left undiscovered even on the last day of our college life. i'll probably be in this university for the next five years, so that's a lot of time. we'll probably walk into unchartered territory on that final day and realize :
'ah. we've never been here before. imagine. five years, and we never knew this place existed. and it's right beside that place where we used to sit around and burn stuff and have five star and ice tea. ah.'
well, we're getting around to know the campus. bit by baby-step bit.
It's sad that these days they dont show any of d good cartoons of the old days. even if they do, its in hindi! growing up, i watched a lotta stuff.. and they were all sooo goood.. i just spent a better part of my day digging up some videos on youtube...
these were some of my favorites :
dexter's lab courage the cowardly dog two stupid dogs samurai jack (now they got shit like 'chuddie buddie' playing on prime time. yes, chuddie means underwear. shit!!)
take some time out n watch some of the videos here....... you're bound to enjoy em...... they bring back memories [:)][:)].....
'stupid dog, ya made me look bad... ooga-booga-booga!!!'
'aww in't that cuute??? but it's wrooooooooooooooong!!!!!'
'this intro is soooo damn hot!!!"
THOSE EYES!!!!! samurai jack was singlehandedly one of THE BEST cartoons i have ever seeen..... they should be making a film on it.
"whadu i do??? whadu i do????????"
eat your heart out 'chuddie buddie'!!! note: click on play twice to make d videos work! fin